When you've been with someone for a long time, it can be difficult to start thinking about the relationship not progressing to the next step. You have known just about everything about one another from how they drink their coffee to what they like to sleep in, and there may be still chemistry and you may love them, but it doesn't mean there is a future with them. You'll want to read this article for some of the telling signs that you might be in a relationship going nowhere that you'd better get out of as soon as possible.
Signs Your Relationship Will Go Nowhere
Future Planning Often Leads to Arguments.
When you talk about the future with your significant other and they get defensive, it could be a clear sign that your relationship is headed to a dead end. Whether it's about getting engaged, picking a wedding date, or simply moving in together or taking a long vacation with one another, if your partner doesn't give you a clear reason as to why you aren't going to take the next step, it is time to reevaluate your relationship.
Celebrations Make Your Significant Other Uncomfortable.
Have to attend wedding together, get invitations to baby showers or even big family celebrations but meet with resistance from your significant other? They might take these invitations as feeling pressured to take the next step with you with which they don't have an interest in doing.
They Are Not Very Supportive.
While you are always there to help they think through a difficult decision, you don't get the same support in return. When you turn to them to vent about work or ask for advice about how to pursue your goals, they give you little to no feedback or even worse just tell you to quit or suck it up.
There's No Excitement.
The butterflies have taken flight and you simply are not excited to see them can be a red flag for your relationship. You need to figure out either how to bring the passion back in or it is simply time to end it. Long term relationship tends to go down this path when everything has just become boring and routine, but when you don't have the loving feelings anymore, your relationship isn't going to progress.
You Want Different Things.
There are some things that you can compromise on in a relationship but if you want different things in the future that you can't compromise, you are in a relationship going nowhere. From having children to how to handle finances, these are big topics that you both need to be on the same page about, otherwise there are clear deal breakers for the relationship.
You Dwell On the Past.
Do you keep thinking about how good the relationship used to be? This is a common trap that people fall into to convince themselves to stay in a relationship. When you find yourself living in the past of your relationship because the present state of your relationship is not satisfying, you might not be in the right relationship.
You're Not a Priority.
Does your significant other make time for you and do you make time for them? While you guys may be spending time together, is it just when there happens to be some spare time in your schedule? You need to make time for one another and not just when it's convenient if you are serious about your relationship.
They Don't Ask for Your Opinion.
You both have your own lives, but if you are discussing your lives together, then your relationship is going to get a lot more difficult in the future. If your significant other has all these plans for their future but hasn't asked about your plans or what you want, then you are just going to be following along with what they want. You can put your life on hold and hope that at some point you can work on your goals, but is it really worth for someone who hasn't even asked you to be a part of their plans?
You Know They Aren't Ready.
Sometimes, when you are honest with yourself about why you don't bring up marriage or take the next step, you know it's because you know they simply aren't ready, and you avoid discussing the future because you don't want to make them uncomfortable. However, if you can't have an adult conversation about your future, your relationship may have no future.
It's All About the Sex.
Yes, every relationship needs to have passion, but if your relationship is solely based on the sex, you have been in a relationship going nowhere. You need to have a relationship that has more meaning behind it.
There Aren't Bother When Someone Else Gives You Attention.
Maybe you've received flowers from a secret admirer or there is a woman at the end of the bar clearly eying you up and your significant other isn't even the slightest bit jealous, there's a problem. Even worse, when they respond to these advances you are receiving from others with a comment like “glad we are on the same page about seeing other people”, it's a clear sign the relationship is going nowhere.
They Do Nothing Even You've Been Threatened to End Things.
If you've tried to have a conversation about where your relationship is headed and it's been meeting with resistance, you should probably give them an ultimatum. And if still, they aren't willing to move forward in the relationships, end things. Leave them wherever they are and if they don't follow you or at least apologize within 48 hours, you know where the relationship stands.
You Know Little About Their Personal Life.
You haven't met their family, you don't hang out with their friends and you actually know very little about what they do when they aren't with you, then these are clear indications they aren't ready to make you a permanent fixture in their life. If you guys aren't sharing your past, present or future lives together, then you can't build a relationship that is intimate and trusting.
There Is Little Trust.
Without trust, no relationship will last. Whether you don't trust them or they don't trust you, either scenario is not a positive one. When a relationship lacks trust, there are often more jealousy, aggression and commitment issues that you may be bargaining for in the future.
You Just Aren't Happy.
A relationship going nowhere is one that you are miserable in. If you cringe when they text you or the misery of your relationship has begun to affect other areas of your life, you need to get out of that relationship. If your relationship is making you feel trapped and like an over-emotional teenager, it's also not a healthy one to be in.
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